I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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