let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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