DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
