im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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