Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Randomize
