All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
