So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
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was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
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Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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