I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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