was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
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