O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
