Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
