I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
