I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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