I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
so let's talk penis.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
