bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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