In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
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It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
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At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
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