I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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