Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
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