i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
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