You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
