It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
