i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
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