That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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