Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
