Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize