pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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