Yo dont text me then not text me
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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