question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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