we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I love you.
Bad choice
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
