I wish i was in the wii world.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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