This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Be still, my beating vagina.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
