i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Randomize