Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?