You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
