Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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