She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
