Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
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he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize