We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
