dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
