Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
false alarm, still single
Randomize