areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Everclear isn't food dammit
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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