Don't make out with my wife yet
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
