it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
