I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize