Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
