I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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