Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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