oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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