Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
someone owes me an orgasm
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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