I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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