I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
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